Category Archives: Personal Musings

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Tuesday’s Random Thoughts

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With school in session, it’s too hard to post every night so I’ve decided to post weekly instead of trying to post daily.  As soon as it becomes a Have-To instead of a Get-To, then the fun has been sucked out of it.  I’m enjoying my Blog and don’t want the fun sucked out! 

My random thoughts over the past week have been on running and religion – kind of strange, I know.

Running

Maybe some of you are interested in how I am doing on my 8-week running training program.  Well, I finished Week One this weekend (run for 30 min total, but alternate 1 min of running with 2 min of walking along with 3 min of walking warm-up and cool down for a total of 36 minutes). I was supposed to do this every other day alternating with 30 minutes of just walking.  Not too bad, right?  Well, I don’t feel that I did well enough to graduate to Week Two (similar to above except it’s 2 min of running with 1 min of walking) so I’m repeating Week One this week.

The one thing that I’ve noticed is that my knees are beginning to feel it a bit 😦 .  I have found some stretches that are supposed to prevent knee pain and I will be adding those to my routine.  I hate to think that my running goal is already in jeopardy after a week and a half!!  Man, I’m old and out of shape!

Religion

Um, this seems like a heady topic to take on and I’ve never meant for this blog to be controversial in any way, but I must bring this up because I can’t stop thinking about it due to the Gay Marriage and Ground Zero controversies in the news.  I usually avoid the topic of religion because it evokes strong emotions, is very personal and no one budges an inch (it seems) after a discussion. 

Growing up we were mostly Easter & Christmas Christians and thus, religion was not prominent in our household.  At some point in my parents’ lives after my sister and I left the fold, their faith has deepened and is very important to them.  I’ve seen how their faith has comforted them through the trials of life and I can respect the peace it gives them.  However, I have to say that much to my parents’ dismay, I’m still a raging agnostic.  I’ve always been a somewhat of an empiricist and skeptic and of course, the existence of God can neither be proven or disproven, so therein lies the conundrum for me. 

Going to church does make me feel like a fraud once a week, but it’s one of those things I do for my kids.  What I mean by that is in making the decision to attend church, my husband and I had committed to go “all in” and not be the C & E Christians.  We both think that it’s good to expose them to religion and let them ultimately make their own choices.  I’ve been completely honest with all three of my children about where I stand on the topic and with the fact that they will have to come to their own conclusions about faith and religion.  Like I said earlier, it’s a personal choice so I (or anyone else) can’t make that decision for them.

I was having a discussion with someone over the weekend and religion popped up as one of the topics.

Statement made by companion:  “The Qur’an is an inherently mean-spirited, hateful book”.

I asked this person if he/she had ever read it and the answer was “no”.  So, how can that comment even be made?  That’s how hate speech and rumors are spread (on any topic).  I couldn’t offer an informed rebuttal because I haven’t read the text either.  I’m sure some state out of ignorance that the Bible is an angry book after hearing Old Testament stories (it seems God was a bit angry in the Old Testament – do it my way or I’m going to drown everyone on the planet (except Noah)!).  The point I made is that any religious text (Bible, Qur’an, etc.) can be perverted by the zealous and turned into something hateful and angry.  Our World’s History is rife with unspeakable actions done in the name of religion (pick any religion).

So in an effort to be more informed, I have ordered my very own copy of the Qur’an from Amazon.com – it’s 1300 pages long!  It’s annotated and provides historical references, so maybe I will actually learn something.  It will definitely not be an easy read.

Statement made by companion:  “God has a special place in his heart for the Jewish people”.

This was in response to one of my hang-ups about Christianity.  I had asked my companion, “Do you really think that my Jewish BFF is going to Hell?  Because I can’t accept that.”  Okay, so God really likes the Jewish people, but not enough to let them into Heaven.  Hmmmm…  Since Abraham is the father of many religions – Christianity, Islam and Judaism – doesn’t that mean that God in all three of the religions is the same entity?  If so, are there separate Heavens for each one?  You know, Separate but Equal, like segregation?  Does God give a knowing wink at the Christians as he tells the others that he likes them best?   This may sound irreverent, but that is one of the many, many issues I have. 

 Statement by me:  “If you believe in Heaven, you have to believe in Hell.  The Yin and Yang of life so-to-speak.  Do you believe in Satan?”

My companion answered in the affirmative.  I personally don’t think that there is an evil entity walking around whispering in people’s ears to commit evil acts.  I think that people are capable of evil acts and it’s by choice.  So, now I have to consider the fact that if I don’t believe in Hell, can I still believe in Heaven?  Hmm….I guess I won’t really find out real deal until I leave this earth.

I have other dilemmas/questions about religion in general and Christianity specifically, but it would make this post TOO long.  Sorry for the randomness of this post, but these were the things swirling around in my brain this past week.

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Two for the Price of One – “Awesome!”

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I was going to write a post on something else today, BUT yesterday I received my unsolicited ValPak envelope that arrives in my mailbox every so often.  I have to say that I usually keep one coupon out of the 30-40 or so coupons – it’s for a Chinese restaurant that we frequent about once a month.  When searching for my Chinese restaurant coupon, I stumbled across this beauty –

 

I’m not even sure what to say.  I mean if I get a boob job, does that mean that I only have to pay for one of the girls?  Or if I pay for both of the girls, can I get my butt lifted for free? 

I think this little coupon can be viewed as a commentary on our society.  It’s taken something risky and serious like surgery (of any kind) and turned it into something like a Domino’s pizza weekend special! 

Who would this coupon appeal to?  Someone on the fence about plastic surgery just waiting for right deal to come along? 

“Wow, I was really undecided about body altering surgery, but since you’re giving it away for practically nothing, I think I’ll do it!”

Do reputable plastic surgeons offer coupons?  Hmmm…

What about other surgeries? 

 “I need my gallbladder removed, but I think I’ll wait for the best coupon deal to arrive in my ValPak envelope!  Maybe they’ll  have two-fer – gallbladder and appendix!  Oh, wait!  Here’s my ValPak envelope.  Look, Honey, it’s my lucky day – a two-fer on useless organs!  I’m giving them a call right now!”

 

The plastic surgery center of the coupon shown above is offering a special on the Brazilian Butt Lift (using your own natural fat – I have plenty of that!).  Why Brazilian?  Are they known to have the best looking booties around?

 Hmmm…. maybe I do need a butt lift.

 

 

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I’m Not a Silly Man in a Fur Coat!

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Our family was watching some vintage Scooby Doo, when a very interesting cartoon short played to take up the remaining time until the next main show was to start.  The cartoon was “The Bear That Wasn’t”.  It’s about 10 minutes long, but it is worth it.

What  a great little cartoon.  It simply touched on so many things.  The cartoon, made in 1967 by Chuck Jones,  was based on a book written in 1946.  I copied the Plot and Themes from the Wikipedia page because they summarize the cartoon so nicely – I couldn’t have done it justice.  It’s startling how the Themes of this cartoon are still applicable to today, isn’t it? 

Per Wikipedia:

PLOT 

A bear settles down for his long winter nap, and while he sleeps the progress of man continues. He wakes up to find himself in the middle of an industrial complex. He then gets mistaken by the foreman for a worker and is told to work. To this he responds, “But I’m not a man, I’m a bear”. He is then taken to each of his successive bosses, who try to convince him that he is just a “silly man who needs a shave and wears a fur coat”, reaching all the way up to an elderly president of the factory who concludes he cannot be a bear because “all bears live in the zoo”. The bear is taken to the zoo, hoping to gain support from his own species, but even the zoo bears claim he is not a bear, because if he was “he’d be behind bars like us”. Eventually he concludes that he must be a “silly man”, and works hard at the factory to the satisfaction of the foreman and the other bosses. However, winter comes again, and he feels cold. He wishes he knew what a “silly man” would do to get warm. But in the end he finds a cave and enters, feeling comfortable and bear-like once more. As the bear is sleeping, he reflects on the events of the year, as the narrator concludes that because all the bosses and even the zoo bears disbelieved he was a bear, did not make it so. “The truth is he was not a silly man…and he was not a silly bear, either”.

THEMES

Though appearing as a children’s book, this story takes a critical and satirical look at aspects of society. It revolves around the concept of people believing a repeated idea even though it may not be true. People have a tendency to shift their views if a concept is hammered into them over and over again, like the bear being told he is a “silly man who needs a shave and wears a fur coat”. The bear eventually succumbs to this mistaken assumption, believing he is a man even though he had previously known otherwise, just as humans shift their views on a topic because of repetitive information, or because ‘they all say it is true, therefore it must be’. Yet, in the end, the bear, who is cold in winter, reverts back to what he really is – a bear – and finds shelter in a cave. This idea covers the concept of people never changing due to outside influence. Though a person may change for someone else, when placed in a difficult position, they revert back to old habits – just like the bear hibernating. Whether something’s fact or fiction, it is what it is and doesn’t change – no matter how many people believe otherwise.

The book also presents a visual satire of corporate culture. Each time the bear appears before a higher-ranking man in the corporation, the offices get progressively more elaborate (for example, progressively more phones, more wastebaskets, more secretaries, all according to rank). There is also progressively more chins and less hair on each higher ranking person as the Bear ascends all the way to the president’s office.

When I was watching it  and saw the old, bent, crooked finger of the President pointing at the bear and telling him he was a silly man, I just chuckled.  Has anything really changed since 1946?  It doesn’t seem so.  

Per Einstein, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.   Hmmm….. the world (governmental, corporate, etc.) must be insane, huh?

 

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What the Heck, American Idol?!

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DeGeneres Leaving ‘Idol,’ Says It Was Bad Fit 

by The Associated Press

What??? Really?? I just saw this tweet from NPR announcing that Ellen Degeneres is not returning to American Idol.  I know that she wasn’t overly critical and maybe was too much of a cheerleader, but I felt like she spoke for us as the average viewer and I think she was (is) funny!  Our whole family did.  I also felt like she was an improvement over the goofy Paula.

Simon’s gone and now Ellen.   And, I just heard on the Today Show that Kara may be out too.  That would leave just Randy.  I did hear that Bret Michaels (of Poison), Justin Timberlake, and even Jennifer Lopez were all being considered as replacements.  That seems like a lot for one show. 

When the show first aired, I did not watch it.  My family did. All of them, but me.  I was too freakin’ busy with work at my crazy-ass 60-hr a week job.  “I’m making money, people!  I don’t have time for family fun!”

When I entered the slower lane, I joined the ritual known as American Idol.  I was hooked after Season 5 which was my initiation.  Now, I look forward to it every January! 

With this announcement, I’m torn.  Will it be the same?  Who will the new judge or judges be (do we really need 4 judges?)?  My oldest said that she won’t watch it now that Simon and Ellen are gone.  It was the one show that the entire family could watch together.  The girls now like to watch overly dramatic teenagery shows like “The Secret Life of the American Teenager” and “Pretty Little Liars”.  My 10-yr-old son cannot and does not want to watch these shows (the hubby and I don’t either).   American Idol was the only “family friendly” show appropriate for all ages in our household that everyone liked.  Bummer.

Maybe this will be a good time to start weaning ourselves off of this show.  It’s a commitment and very time-consuming – in the beginning it takes up two or three nights a week!  

It would leave me more time to develop my painting or maybe even a brand new hobby. . . . . .what would it be?

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In The Blink of an Eye

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Yesterday, I posted something about my life getting on my nerves.  And, you know what?  It’s not really that bad – it could be a lot worse.  After posting my rant, I started thinking about an email I received about a week ago and began to feel self-indulgent and ridiculous.

The email informed me that a co-worker from my old place of employment had experienced a tragedy.  He was the catcher during a baseball game – during a play at home, the runner collided with him in such a way that the impact fractured his spinal cord.  This happened on July 1st and he is still in the hospital as of today.  He is on a vent, has a trach, and a feeding tube.  Due to the event, he also started having heart problems so the doctors had to implant a temporary pacemaker.  You can read his story on his blog – Rick’s Recovery.

Rick is one of those rare employees that goes above and beyond the call of duty.  While I worked at Symetra, he was definitely the go-to guy and you could always rely on him to find a solution to your quandary.  I’m sure that he is sorely missed right now.  It’s said that everyone is replaceable – I don’t subscribe to that notion.  There are those that are really, really hard to replace and I believe that Rick is one of those exceptions.

Also, as you know, we’ve joined a CSA this summer – by the way, the fresh veggies have been AWESOME.  The owners of the CSA send us a weekly email which lets us know what to expect in our share and identifies uncommon vegetables.  Well, in the email from last week, they shared with us that one of their friends from Seldom Seen Farm was struck by lightning while working in the field picking onions.  This 28-yr-old woman (with a husband and small child) has been placed  in a medically induced coma, but is breathing on her own which is good news.  I’m sure she woke up that morning thinking it was going to be a normal day.

Both of these stories just reminded me (again) that life can change literally in the blink of an eye.  It’s so cliché to say, but it’s true.  Why do I have to read these tales to snap me out of “it’s all about me” bubble?  I can really get on my own nerves!! 

As part of my “What If” endeavor, I’ve got to start working harder on thinking in a new way.  Life is too short and shouldn’t be taken for granted.  Like anything else, it takes commitment and practice, right?  Today, is the beginning (again!).

Wish me luck..

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You’ll Shoot Your Eye Out!

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If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I’d have fewer imaginary ones.  ~Don Herold          

Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere.  ~Glenn Turner          

Wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weights you down.  ~Toni Morrison      

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.  ~Mark Twain           

Per Wikipedia, anxiety is “a future-oriented mood state in which one is ready or prepared to attempt to cope with upcoming negative events.”  

Recently, I’ve been mulling over my increasing anxiety about, well, life.  The anxiety scale ranges from blissfully ignorant (1) to obsessive worrier (10) and I have named the midpoint MWE (my husband’s initials).  It’s appropriate because he seems to have the right combination of worry and “let it be”.  I’m constantly striving to be at the MWE point on this scale, but I’m failing on fairly regular basis.  I hover around 8 or 9 which equates to “Cuckoo”.   

Last Friday morning’s Therapy Breakfast meeting provided me with some food for thought on this topic (besides my standing order of french toast and bacon!).  It was basically the nature vs nurture discussion which I always find fascinating.  You know, birth order, environment, DNA, etc.  This led to a discussion of “Why do some people repeat the perceived parenting mistakes of their own parents? ” And “Why do some people break the mold?”  For example, if your mother was critical of everything you did and you hated it, why are you doing it to your own children?  Or Why are you making a conscious effort not to be critical?  

We came to the conclusion that it had to do with the ability to be introspective.  Either you have it or you don’t.  We all know the people in our lives that clearly do not possess this ability – it’s just not within their grasp.     

Now, I’m not trying to brag, but I possess the ability of introspection – I can go on ad nauseum of why I am the way I am (just ask my breakfast buddies!).  I can make my own head spin if I’m not careful!  This skill has been honed over the years as I’ve tried to figure out  why I have the freakish need to control everything, why I see the peril in every scenario, why had the pathological need to get straight A’s in school, why I was/am afraid of failure, etc.  I’m especially interested now because my anxiety seems to be getting worse.  Is it because I’m an adult now with three kids, a marriage, a mortgage, a dog,  impending college expenses, and the fact that I see imminent danger peeking around every corner?    
 
Well, my husband also exists in this same realm  – how come the hubby doesn’t feel the same level of anxiety?    
 
Some people in my life think I can just shut this off.  “Why are you worried  about it?  You can’t change anything!”   “Oh, really?  I thought I could control everything. Well, shoot!  You know what?  I was getting really tired of feeling anxious all of the time so I’ll just stop the worrying right this very second!  Thanks for the info!”    
 
Is it wrong to envy people that go through life swimming around in the blissfully ignorant end of the pool?  We all know a few of these people in our lives, don’t we?  I can feel smug because they really don’t know what real life is like, but what does that get me?  They seem really happy and mostly stress-free . . . . .Ugh!  They can really get on my nerves!   
 
Why am I swimming toward the deep end of the pool? Who really knows!? But it’s obviously a combination of multiple things – people are complicated!     
 
 
 

Birth Order – I am the first born and, as I’ve said before, I think I possess every trait listed in any book about birth order.  Compliant Traits – People Pleasers, Crave Approval, Nurturers, Caregivers, Reliable, Concientious, Cooperative, Team Players, “Grin and bear it” mentality / Aggressive Traits –  Natural Leaders, Perfectionists, Driven, Conventional, Always have things under control, Want things their way.      

Genetics – I come from a long line of professional worriers – my mother, my mother’s mother (I think they were all the first-borns, hmmmm).  I could tell you stories to back this up, but they aren’t that exciting.  

Environment – Our house growing up was very chaotic and unpredictable.  This definitely intensified my need to try to control every facet of my surroundings.   

Since I do recognize most of my shortcomings, I’m definitely working toward creating a stable, predictable, “normal” household for our three children.  Of course, with High Anxiety Mommy, it can be a challenge!   As I’m trying to “break the mold”, I’m sure I’m also creating some unintended environmental landmines for my kids to discuss in therapy when they get older.  What are parents for anyway, right?!

Carpe Diem (but wear your seatbelt)!

 

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How Do You Know When It’s a Slow News Day?

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Well. . . . . . . I think it’s when you read a headline like the one below.  I’ve started a notebook/file of sorts where I write down various ideas for blog topics.  As I was going through this file today, this headline caught my eye again!  How could it not?  I mean, who says “buttocks” any more?  When is the last time you saw it in a headline?

I remember when I read this story aloud to my family on the way home from our Bed Bug Adventure this April, I was in tears from laughing so hard!  I almost couldn’t get through the article (and it’s a short article). The quotes from the students did me in.

I’ve watched a lot of “bloody” shows and read a lot of “bloody” books and I’ve never seen an episode or read a book where a miscreant devolved into a serial “you-name-it” from slapping butts (excuse me, buttocks) while also riding a bike.  I guess it could happen….

Cops alert Ball State campus to buttocks slapper

Click here for link to actual story from WishTV8.

Updated: Friday, 09 Apr 2010, 11:07 AM EDT
Published : Thursday, 08 Apr 2010, 3:01 PM EDT

MUNCIE, Ind. (WISH) – Ball State University Police are investigating two on campus assaults in which case the suspect slapped two women on the buttocks as he rode by on a bicycle Wednesday morning.  According to a public safety notice sent out to students and staff on Wednesday the assaults took place near Worthen Arena and the Student Health Center. The Ball State Daily News reports a third victim declined to file a police report.  “According to Assistant Chief Robert Fey, two women walking in the area reported being slapped on their buttocks by a white male as he rode past them on a bicycle,” the notice read.

24-Hour News 8 obtained a copy of the police reports which show the victims to be an 18-year-old woman and a 33-year-old woman. The 33-year-old woman is believed to be a staff member.  Each report is classified as a “simple assault” that happened between 7:50 and 8 a.m. Wednesday.

Dean of Students, Dr. Kay Bales, said the university is taking this very seriously.  “This is an assault. It’s unwanted touching by another individual. It’s a crime,” she said.  Ball State issued a public safety notice to students and employees after the incidents. Reaction was mixed.

“I thought it was horrible, what happened to these girls,” said student Jenika Garison.

“Somebody got their butt slapped,” said another student, Michael Hole. “It’s kind of funny.”

A Facebook group supporting the bicyclist has sprouted up since the public safety notice went out on Wednesday and has attracted nearly 7,000 fans. An opposing group was created as a protest the formation of the group that supports the suspect, it had 210 fans when this story was last updated.

“It’s not that big a deal,” said student Adam Jermain. “I feel like it’s the Boy Who Cried Wolf and I think no one is going take the broadcast seriously.”  Jermain denied his opinion was because he’s a man and not a woman.  “No, I could be afraid the butt slapper is going to smack me next,” Jermain said.

The university said the assaults should not be looked at as a joke. Authorities are hoping to catch the accused attacker before he smacks again.  “It’s never a waste of time to take seriously reports of assault and to investigate those,” said Dr. Bales.

“If this guy thinks he can get away with hitting someone there then what next,” added Garison.

If you have any information on the assaults, call the Ball State University Police at 765-285-1111.

 

A song & video has already been written and uploaded about this incident – check it out:

Even though I was thoroughly amused by this story, I still have to ask , “Why was that news?!”

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Just Say, “NO!” to Soul-Sucking

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I’ve been reminiscing about Corporate Life.  Why?

Can you indulge me in a bit of recollection (it will self-explanatory)? 

I was 1 of  24 or so RGMs (Regional Group Manager to you!) in a 1500-employee financial/insurance services firm.  RGM sounds really important, doesn’t it?  It was really a fancy name for medical-insurance-sales-rep-who-also-has-to-do-all-of-her-own-underwriting.  By the time I was promoted from lowly backroom underwriter to RGM (about 2002), I had imbibed too much of the Kool-Aid.  I thought it was great!  Now, I’m going to get respect, more responsibility and more money!  Isn’t that what I had been working toward in my career?!  (“Be careful what you wish for!”)

Does anyone remember this commercial?  When I was working FT (defined as 60 hrs/wk) at my corporate job, this ad went viral among the worker bees (I LOVED this whole series of ads):

Ahhh, this ad brings back so many flashbacks (I mean, memories)!  During the last three months of  every year, the company would be anxious about the new cases sold for January (January sales represented roughly 30-40% of our annual sales), but every Fall they would increase our rate tables (what the hell??).  It was the craziest damn thing.  I’m pretty sure those on Mt. Olympus knew that Fall was important so it was very baffling.  But you could hear the implied whisperings “What was the problem?  You should be able to convince your producers to sell these rates to the client!”  “If your producers really liked you, these higher rates would not be a problem!” 

While I was there (8 yrs), we either acquired a company or were acquired 5 times which means I had 6 different business cards.  The kicker was that the transition to the new combined company would happen in the FALL just about every time (I wish I was kidding)!    The transition also included the RIF (reduction in force) and during each RIF, it seemed to me that they slowly chipped away at the pool of talented employees (which was demoralizing).  We had to learn a new system, a new paper-trail process, adjust to employees lost, adjust to the new employees, etc. AND sell our asses off!  No problem!

I would refer to my occupation as the “Job with the Golden Handcuffs”.  I couldn’t argue too much about my compensation (which is unusual, I know), but was it worth all of the late nights, time away from home, etc.?  So during each RIF, I would think that my nine lives had finally run out and would almost be grateful for the release from bondage only to find out that I still had my job.  Was I supposed to happy or sad?  Hmmmm.  It was a  twisted, soul-sucking rollercoaster ride. 

What is shocking (now that I have actually thought about it) is that it took me about 8 months to get the courage to break free from the golden handcuffs.  Why did I feel that I had no way out?!  That will require some serious psychoanalysis, I’m afraid.  Bring it on, Freud!

Back to the original question –  from time to time, a couple of my friends who are still in the underwriting business will mention job openings in their respective places of employment.  When I hear word of these openings, I am instantly intrigued and my corporate juices begin flowing.  “It will be different this time.”  “You won’t end up  working 20 extra hours a week.”  “This place will not be as crazy as the last.”

Then my hubby and/or my BFFs quickly slap my face as they are shouting, “Snap Out of It!” 

The much-needed slap releases the flood images of  all of the asinine, ridiculous, back-biting, worthless crap that went on (for a sample of similar corporate craziness, read the Living Dilbert blog ).  I used to think that it was just our company.  But after talking with others that have worked or are still working in similar corporate situations, I have finally come to the realization that it’s  the same sh!t, different company.  It’s a miracle anything productive happens in the Corporate World.

I won’t go back, I won’t go back!

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Shhh… Mommy is Watching her “Bloody” Show!

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No, I’m not British.  I literally mean blood – the red stuff coursing through our veins.  I have often wondered why my favorite TV shows are CSI, CSI NY (I don’t like the Miami version), Criminal Minds, NCIS, Bones, The Closer, Forensic Files, etc.  (I do like other shows – The Universe, Mythbusters, Glee, American Idol, but I would give those up for the bloody genre in a heartbeat!).

I know that Mike really wonders as well – I think he is actually worried that I could kill him and dispose of his body without leaving any trace evidence (trace evidence in criminal cases include fingerprints, hairs, cosmetics, plant fibers, mineral fibers, synthetic fibers, glass, paint chips, soils, botanical materials, gunshot residue, explosives residue, and volatile hydrocarbons.)  I hate to admit it, but I think I could very easily “take care of him”, so he better be on his best husband behavior!

Mike does win the patience award.  Our house does not follow the social norm of  “the men control the remotes”.  In our family, we usually adhere to most social conventions, but not this one!  The girls rule in our house and mostly THIS girl (can I still refer to myself as a girl?).  Unfortunately for him, he has to watch the bloody shows night after night (can I help it if they are on all of the time?!) or go to a different room in search of another TV.  For a long time now, Jack’s first question as he enters the living room has been (and still is), “Mommy, are you watching one of your bloody shows?”.   

Is there a blood-lust gene?  If so, I think my daughters have it as they are both addicted to Bones.  Maddie has the Season 3 DVD box set to watch at her leisure.  Argh! What have I done to my children?!

Why the extreme attraction to this genre (written, movies and television)?

When I was a kid, the books that I LOVED to read were Agatha Christie, Nancy Drew, Trixie Belden, anything mystery-ish.  My drop-dead favorite cartoon growing up was Scooby-Doo.  Mystery, Inc. rocked!  I wanted to be part of the “gang” (who didn’t, right?).

But, who could forget Charlie’s Angels?!  I was 11 yrs old when the show debuted and I stayed up past my bedtime to watch it!  Who knew you could be hot and be a crime-solver?!  I thought you had to be like Agatha Christie or Sherlock Holmes.  I’m pretty sure I missed my calling – I should have majored in forensics.  Wait, I’m not saying I’m hot, but I am saying that solving crimes sounds a hell of a lot sexier than selling insurance.  Doesn’t it?

Which sounds better?

Question:   Excuse me, Miss Engledow, but what exactly do you do for a living?

Answer A:  “Well, I’m a licensed life and health rep for a local agency that sells employee group benefits.  Do you have adequate life and disability coverage for your employees?”

OR

Answer B:   “Well, I’m a DNA Forensic Scientist and I work for the local crime lab.  We just solved an interesting case where the husband was found beaten to death with the wife’s cell phone.  Apparently, she killed her husband because he lost his cell phone and then failed to do a proper and thorough search for the lost item in question.  It must have been the last straw – I think the poor woman was pushed over the edge by her spouse!”

It’s no contest! – B-

Is it too late to go back to school to become a Forensic Pathologist or a DNA Specialist?  Hmmm.

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A Tale of a Runaway (well, almost)

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I was intrigued by the recent story in the news about the Runaway Mom, Tiffany Tehan.  I mean, who hasn’t ever thought of running away – even just once?

But, to actually do it is what?  Crazy, irresponsible, cruel, selfish, etc.?!  Especially the way that she did it – no contact what-so-ever.  What did she really think was going to happen?  That she could disappear and have her awesome, stress-free life now? 

I’ve read some quotes from her in various news articles and here are a few gems:

Tiffany Tehan Wants to Repay Cops for Search – So They Don’t File Charges (www.cbsnews.com, Apr 30th):

The 31-year-old apologized on “Inside Edition” on Thursday and said her religious upbringing made divorce impossible.

– This statement just has me confused.  So betraying your husband, daughter, family and friends is deemed okay and congruent with your religious upbringing?

She says, in hindsight, that the decision to run was not right for her. 

– Really? Ya think?  She has the under-developed frontal lobe of a teenager.  According to my almost 16-yr-old daughter, teens make bad, short-sighted decisions because their frontal lobes aren’t fully developed.  Apparently, the frontal lobes are completely mature around our early to mid  20s, but hers must be idling at maybe age 15.

 Runaway Mom Tiffany Tehan Didn’t Think Search Would Go Nationwide (www.abcnews.go.com, May 3rd):

“In a nutshell I was feeling pretty overwhelmed with life, just the pressures of work and raising a 1-year-old daughter,” she (Tiffany Tehan) said. “I wish that I had handled things completely differently.”

– Who hasn’t felt this way at one time or another?  I mean, I have three kids! One seems like a cake walk now.  Anyway, you don’t runaway, you go out for martinis with your friends!  Did she think her “new” life would be any different? What if she had more kids with the new guy?  Refer back to the immature frontal lobe.

“I really didn’t think anyone would look that hard for me,” Tehan said. “Maybe a little bit, but not nearly what it turned into.”

– She really thought that her husband, parents, siblings and friends would just be like, “Well, she’s gone.  Nothing else we can do here.  Let’s get on with our lives!  At least she left us the car!”

There are others, but you get the picture.  One of the puzzling things for me regarding this story is the husband’s reaction.  It appears that he has forgiven her and wants her back.  Let’s face it, this whole story is perplexing.

Now, I’m not discounting her feelings of being stressed out and overwhelmed, just her reaction to it.  My husband and family will probably cringe when they hear this, but as I’ve driven in circles around Carmel doing my taxi duties after working all day, I have often thought, “What if I just keep driving and don’t look back?” (Of course, I would make sure all kids have exited the taxi first).  This thought popped in my mind more frequently when I was working full-time, but it still makes its way to the surface now and again.  There are some days when I feel that I just can’t keep up with my life and the life of my family (since I am family manager) and it is overwhelming. 

I still haven’t called about Rachel’s driving test (that reminds me – I really need to do that!), the interior painting quote, the quote to replace all of our windows, the kennel for Jasper in May & June, Camp Pyoca for the kids, blah, blah, blah. . . . . . . .  Ummmm, maybe I should go upstairs to pack my bags and get in the car and drive.

Oh, . . . . . . . .  wait   a   minute!  My van (a.k.a. the taxi)  is in the shop today for the umpteenth time in the last 8 months (about $500 worth of work and they need to keep my car overnight).  CRAP!  This is really going to put a dent in my escape plans.

I guess I will have to work on an escape plan later – another item for my “To Do” list.  Shoot!