How Do You Know When It’s a Slow News Day?

Well. . . . . . . I think it’s when you read a headline like the one below.  I’ve started a notebook/file of sorts where I write down various ideas for blog topics.  As I was going through this file today, this headline caught my eye again!  How could it not?  I mean, who says “buttocks” any more?  When is the last time you saw it in a headline?

I remember when I read this story aloud to my family on the way home from our Bed Bug Adventure this April, I was in tears from laughing so hard!  I almost couldn’t get through the article (and it’s a short article). The quotes from the students did me in.

I’ve watched a lot of “bloody” shows and read a lot of “bloody” books and I’ve never seen an episode or read a book where a miscreant devolved into a serial “you-name-it” from slapping butts (excuse me, buttocks) while also riding a bike.  I guess it could happen….

Cops alert Ball State campus to buttocks slapper

Click here for link to actual story from WishTV8.

Updated: Friday, 09 Apr 2010, 11:07 AM EDT
Published : Thursday, 08 Apr 2010, 3:01 PM EDT

MUNCIE, Ind. (WISH) – Ball State University Police are investigating two on campus assaults in which case the suspect slapped two women on the buttocks as he rode by on a bicycle Wednesday morning.  According to a public safety notice sent out to students and staff on Wednesday the assaults took place near Worthen Arena and the Student Health Center. The Ball State Daily News reports a third victim declined to file a police report.  “According to Assistant Chief Robert Fey, two women walking in the area reported being slapped on their buttocks by a white male as he rode past them on a bicycle,” the notice read.

24-Hour News 8 obtained a copy of the police reports which show the victims to be an 18-year-old woman and a 33-year-old woman. The 33-year-old woman is believed to be a staff member.  Each report is classified as a “simple assault” that happened between 7:50 and 8 a.m. Wednesday.

Dean of Students, Dr. Kay Bales, said the university is taking this very seriously.  “This is an assault. It’s unwanted touching by another individual. It’s a crime,” she said.  Ball State issued a public safety notice to students and employees after the incidents. Reaction was mixed.

“I thought it was horrible, what happened to these girls,” said student Jenika Garison.

“Somebody got their butt slapped,” said another student, Michael Hole. “It’s kind of funny.”

A Facebook group supporting the bicyclist has sprouted up since the public safety notice went out on Wednesday and has attracted nearly 7,000 fans. An opposing group was created as a protest the formation of the group that supports the suspect, it had 210 fans when this story was last updated.

“It’s not that big a deal,” said student Adam Jermain. “I feel like it’s the Boy Who Cried Wolf and I think no one is going take the broadcast seriously.”  Jermain denied his opinion was because he’s a man and not a woman.  “No, I could be afraid the butt slapper is going to smack me next,” Jermain said.

The university said the assaults should not be looked at as a joke. Authorities are hoping to catch the accused attacker before he smacks again.  “It’s never a waste of time to take seriously reports of assault and to investigate those,” said Dr. Bales.

“If this guy thinks he can get away with hitting someone there then what next,” added Garison.

If you have any information on the assaults, call the Ball State University Police at 765-285-1111.


A song & video has already been written and uploaded about this incident – check it out:

Even though I was thoroughly amused by this story, I still have to ask , “Why was that news?!”

3 thoughts on “How Do You Know When It’s a Slow News Day?

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