Lemons into Lemonade? Whatever!

Yesterday (Monday, of course) was literally one of those days. 

There were no subtle hints – it just started out like any other day:

Showered & dressed for work

Folded a load of laundry

Started a new load of laundry

Got the kids on the bus

Made coffee (gotta have it!)

Ate breakfast

Made my lunch

Unloaded and loaded the dishwasher

Dropped Jasper at the groomers (this doesn’t happen every morning!)

Drove to work in the lemon . . . .

I parked my car in the usual spot in the parking lot, walked in the office, said “Good Morning”  to some co-workers, put my lunch in the refrigerator, and headed toward my cube (this is pretty much the morning routine) – UGH! That is when I discovered my wardrobe malfunction!  The girls were on display – the button on my blouse had failed me!  “How long had I been sporting this look?  Did the ladies at the groomers get a peek? If so, why didn’t they say anything?! Women are supposed to stick together! What about my co-workers?”  Oh, great

It did remind me why I don’t buy a lot of button-down blouses (maybe never again) – they’re usually made for flat-chested, pencil-thin women.  That would not be me – I’ve got boobs, damn it!  If I pick a blouse that can contain the girls, it’s too big everywhere else and visa versa!  I want to point out  that I’m NOT in the ranks with Pamela Anderson or Dolly Parton – I’m not!  I’m just a normal-sized woman – that’s my irritation!!  The only store where I’ve had a modicum of success is Ann Taylor Loft – they seem to understand (or sympathize) with women with curves.  However, this ATL button-down blouse let me down today.  😦

 I survived my day at work without any further malfunctions (wardrobe or otherwise) and now it’s time to go! I get into the lemon  –  the air conditioner starts acting wonky.  It was running, but the air wasn’t getting cold (it was hotter than Hades yesterday, too – 90 degrees).  “Really??!! Now, what?!  I just spent $800 on you 3 weeks ago!  What is wrong with you?” 

Aaahhhhh! I’m so sick of this car!  After getting a grip, I call the garage (they know who I am by the sound of my voice) and set up a lemon appointment for Wednesday.  The nice person on the other end of the phone said that it sounds like the freon needs charged – that better be it!  If they call me tomorrow and tell me that  it’s going to be another $800, you will see me on the evening news.  I will the be crazed, wild-eyed woman going postal on my van and turning it into freakin’ lemonade! 

Bottoms up!

BTW, the rest of the day was frantic, but incident-free:  picked up Jasper from the groomers (in hot, oven-like car), cooked and ate dinner with the kids, and then ran off to painting class for some Jenni-time.

Wednesday better be “Good News” day!

Who? Me? I was the crazy one?!

Okay, I think I will probably be the “crazy” person in someone else’s post tonight.  I will admit it – I had an adult tantrum today.  Ugh!  I really hate it when I do that!

My day started out like any other day except maybe even better – I got to have breakfast with my husband (we hardly ever get to have meals alone).  We were on our way to our daughter’s Fashion Show at the high school (the fashion show is where all of the girls from the sewing classes model their class projects – it’s a very cool event).

Okay, we were told that the fashion show started at 9:30am, so we get there at 9:00am – we wanted front row seats!  Well, the show didn’t start until 10:00am!  (Have you done the math?  We were there for an HOUR before the show started).  My husband was sleeping sitting upright (which is an art, by the way) and parents were furiously checking voicemail and emails because some do have jobs!  However, it eventually got underway and it was fun.

Not a bad day so far, right?

Today I’m working from home, but now with 1/2 a day gone.  As I’ve mentioned before, my job has manageable stress attached to it.  But, not today.  My boss has two key presentations – 1 tomorrow at 10am (just found out about this one Wednesday afternoon) and 1 on Monday at 9:00am – he needs both done today in order to review prior to the meetings.  But, I thought that I could pull it together fairly quickly……not so.  Tick, Tock! Eventually, one down, one to go and time is running out.  I have about an hour before my daughter gets home.  I know I can do it!

She had an appointment at 4pm and we have to leave the minute she gets home (usually 3:35pm).  She gets home and I’m about two minutes from being able to hit the “send” button!  I’m done, hit the send button, grab my purse, yell at my daughter to get in the car AND we’re off!  We have 15 minutes to drive a 25-minute drive – I’m driving like a mad soccer mom hyped up on red bull (or adrenaline – I hate to be late!). 

Halfway there, I realize that I left my phone on the charging stand!  @%#^!  @&%*$!  (Oops, my daughter is in the car!)  As I’ve mentioned before, I have a real phone obsession (what if my kids or my hubby tries to call me?).  Okay, we pull in the parking lot (4:05pm), rush into the waiting room breathless only to be told that our appointment is at 5:00pm, NOT 4:00pm!  Huh?  What? 

This is when I had my tantrum – I wasn’t too loud, but I just stood there, let out a few huffy breaths and stared at the receptionist like I didn’t really hear her correctly.  She repeated that my appointment was at 5pm.   “Do I want to come back in an hour or reschedule?”  Dazed and confused – what should I do?  Well, I should call home to let the other kids know that we were going to be late, but oh, wait, I don’t have my phone!  After I slowly snap out of it, I borrow their phone, call home  and no one answers (I’ve told the kids not to answer the phone unless they recognize the number – when did  they start listening to me?).   We have nothing better to do, but drive home and get my phone, so that’s what we do (oh, and I spill my drink on me along the way) – 25 minutes home, 25 minutes back (Bright Side:  1.25 hours of uninterrupted talk-time with my 13-yr old).


By the time we get back to the appointment, Maddie and I are laughing.  I’m ready to just sit in the waiting room, do some deep breathing, check a few emails, check my weekend calendar and then read my book (Physics of the Impossible: A Scientific Exploration into the World of Phasers, Force Fields, Teleportation, and Time Travel).  I read a chapter and then turned to my iPhone – it had been a while since I’d powered-down my phone (similar to a computer). (nooo, don’t do it!) What was I thinking?!  It locked up on me like an old computer (my phone is about 2 yrs old)!  I had the “apple of death” screen showing.  UGGGHHH!  Now, I’m having my second tantrum of the day, but it’s inner pandemonium.  You can’t make two scenes in the same place on the same day an hour apart, right?  That would be a little over the top.

Now, I can’t focus on my book because my identity (or phone) is imploding in my hands (crying noises).  While waiting for Maddie, I’m pressing the power button (Paddles!!  Clear!) every 3-5 seconds trying to get it to acknowledge me in some manner – it eventually has to respond, right?

Maddie is done, I show her my “apple of  death” screen and she feels my pain (God love her!).  Is it the magic of youth?  She flipped the same button I had been frantically pressing on the entire time and my phone comes alive!

That’s my girl!