Do These Jeans Make My Butt Look Fat?

Aah, awkward moments, what are you gonna do?

What do you say to someone who sees you fairly regularly (about 2-3 times a month) and says, “Wow, have you been losing weight?”

Whoa!  What? Uh, well, now I’m stunned since I haven’t really lost any weight – maybe 4 lbs in the last 3 months (I can lose/gain that in a day from water weight!).  So I say, “Uh, yes. It must be the warm weather and all of the running around I’m doing.”  She’s like, “That’s what I thought! You look great!”

We said our goodbyes and I walked away puzzling until my puzzler was sore (borrowing from the Grinch).  Usually, you don’t say something like that unless someone has visibly lost maybe 10-15 lbs.   What did I look like before?  Or What did she think I looked like before?  Did I look 15 lbs heavier last week?  I asked my daughter (who witnessed the awkward moment), “What would make her say that?  Is it what I’ve been wearing?”.  She was as stumped as I was.

About two months ago, one of my co-workers said to me, “Those pants make you look really thin.  You look great.”  What does that mean?  That I’m not really thin, but that I just look thin?  The pants created an optical illusion? Maybe I should wear those pants all of the time! 

I have literally been the same weight for the last 6 years or so. Hmmm..

At this point in my life, I’m pretty comfortable with who and what I am body-wise.  Would I like rock-hard abs?  Hell yeah!  But, I can’t devote 8 hrs a day to doing sit-ups (or core-building).  I’m lucky if I get in 30 minutes!

But, I have to say that the comment yesterday did throw me off a bit.  I think I’m in pretty good shape for an old broad, but…..Should I start working out more?  Watch my diet even more closely?  Another, Hmmmmm……

Here are some other questions/statements that have been said to me over the years (some more current than others – apparently some have scarred me for life since I still remember them!):

As I’m walking into the lunchroom to get my lunch from the microwave another employee walks in simultaneously and says, “What’s that smell?!”  [Do I admit that it’s my lunch?]  “It’s my lunch – lamb and lentil stew.”  She smiles awkwardly, makes a funny, and slinks out o f the break room.

“That haircut makes your face look thin!” – What did my face look like before?

“I wouldn’t buy that house, but I can see why you guys like it.” – Uh, okay!

“I can’t wear that color, but it looks good on you.”  – I guess that can be true, but why do you have to preface it with the “I can’t wear it”?

“White bread? Oh, my kids have always eaten wheat bread.”  – I guess we suck as parents!

“Do you want to have your eyebrows done?” – Hey, I just came in for a pedicure!  If I wanted my eyebrows ripped out by the roots, I would have said so!  They ask me this every time I go in for a pedicure – they must look pretty unruly, but I think they have character!

I’m sure everyone has heard similar comments – no one is immune.  Also, I’m not perfect – I have uttered careless comments over the years.  And, usually after I’ve uttered said comment, I think to myself, “Ooops, that’s not how it sounded in my head!” 

After yesterday’s awkward moment, I’m adding “think before you speak” as a personal growth agenda item.

By the way, did you have a nose-job because you look great!

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