Category Archives: Everyday Life

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“Don’t Let the Bedbugs Bite!” & Other Sayings

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Spring Break 2010!  We took the kids to Gatlinburg, TN  last year for Spring Break 2009 and they LOVED it so much they wanted to go back.  It is a perfect place for kids – tons of Kountry Krap stores, putt-putt courses, Ripley’s Believe it or Not!  attractions (Ripley’s owns that town – Aquarium, Odditorium, Haunted Adventure, Mirror Maze, Moving Theater, Guinness World of Records, Mini-Golf), Candy Stores, T-shirt Stores, etc.

Mike & I have been to the Gatlinburg area 4 times (including this time) for various excursions.  The last two times we have been to Gatlinburg, we have rented a “cabin” (it is really a house) from the same company, Smoky Mountain Chalet Rentals, because we have had really good luck with them and the cabins are really nice and consistent in quality.

Tuesday, April 6th:

We were to arrive on Tuesday, April 6th and depart on Saturday, April 10th.  So, we arrive around 4pm on Tuesday to the craziness that is Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg (and, it is not even close to peak season!).  We do our usual grocery stop at the Kroger Store in Pigeon Forge at Stop Light #3 which is always interesting (maybe a topic for another post).  You have to drive through Pigeon Forge to get to Gatlinburg – our cabin is situated in a really pretty stretch of road between PF and G.  There is really only one road through this area (which is CRAZY) so it takes about 45 minutes to go about 7 miles (I’m as serious as a heart attack).

Our lovely cabin, the Wild Rose, is located at the top of a mountain and Mike has to drive the poor, loaded down mini-van in low gear the entire way in order to coax it to the top (it was a little unnerving at times – the van is not made for off-roading).  We get the groceries and luggage unloaded, the kids pick their beds, we try out the pool table,  the kids check out the deck & hot tub, etc.  Ahhhhh, we are finally on vacation.  While everyone was checking out the cabin and beginning to relax, I fixed dinner.  We bought something easy to cook at the Kroger (where I got carded BTW!) so we could watch American Idol (it is a family must). 

Okay, so now it is bedtime!  By the time we got the kids settled and in bed, it was around 11pm.  Mike and I retired to our nice, spacious bedroom – check out the Wild Rose link above and you can see the pictures of the rooms in our cabin.  We turned out the lights – Mike was reading a book with a booklight and I began to drift off to sleep.  It had been a long day!

As I was drifting off to sleep, I thought I felt something on my arm, but I told myself that it was my hair.  Then, I thought I felt something again, but I was SO tired – I must be imagining things.  During this battle in my sleepy brain, Mike was over on his side of the bed moving around and being all fidgety.  Finally, I rolled over to tell him to “Settle Down” and then I see him swatting something off of him and slapping his arm.  Okay,  the sleepy brain is now wide awake and I hopped out of that bed faster than you can blink.  We stared at each other for a moment and then the conversation:

Mike:  “We have a bug problem.”

Jenni:   “What are they?”

Mike:  “I think they are ticks.”

Jenni:  “What?!! Ticks?”

 
Okay, now we are F R E A K I N G OUT!!!  We start running our hands through our hair – I think I did that about 20 times. Then I got my comb and combed my hair over and over and over and over again.  Mike was doing the same thing.  Then I found one on the inside of the sleeve of my pajamas!!!! YUCK!  Now, I’m running into the bathroom to do a complete body check (sorry for the image).  We don’t want Lyme Disease!! 

I’m completely shaking at this point and Mike has killed about 2 dozen of the damn things in the meantime.  They just keep coming out of the headboard – it was like a really, really bad campy horror movie.  So, now we are  as far away from the bed as possible staring at each other again not knowing what we should do (it is about midnight at this point). 

What do we do now?

Do we wake up the kids and check their beds (they were sleeping soundly)?  Our girls have amazing bug radars and we felt that they would have been up already if there was an issue.

Do we call the owners?  What could they possibly do for us at midnight? 

It took us a long time to decide not to wake the kids, not to call the owners and to sleep on the couches.  We found some sheets in a closet, inspected them closely and went out and “slept” in the living room.  I ran my fingers through my hair until I dozed off and Mike never really went to sleep.

Wednesday, April 7th

Well, it is morning and, of course, the kids are wondering why we are sleeping on the couch.  We confessed the horror of the night before and told them that we would be moving  this day to a new place – but where?  Mike called the owners and told him that the cabin had an infestation of some sort and the owner agreed to send over an exterminator, would see about another cabin, and call us back.  Well, guess what?  He had no other cabins!! What the heck are we going to do now???

The exterminator shows up and both Mike and I follow him to the bedroom – what’s the diagnosis?  Now, the really yucky thing is that the “bugs” were on the headboard still, but you could barely see them in the daylight.  You had to know what to look for.  Okay, the bug guy thinks they look like ticks as well. I had him check the kids’ beds – NO bugs.  Whew! Did he know any numbers for other cabin rentals that we could call?  He did!  Thank goodness.  He gave us 2 leads – what a great, helpful guy!  He leaves to get some bug spray to de-tick the headboard as a short-term measure.  They need to de-bug the entire place, but can’t until we leave.  We can’t leave until we have a new plan.  “BTW, do we need to worry about our suitcases and clothing that were in the room?”  (Mike had put his clothes in the dresser – my suitcase was still packed, but zipped up on the floor.)  Bug Man recommended putting all of our clothes through a full dryer cycle as that would kill any bugs and any eggs (EWWWWWWWWW!).

We call the first number he gave us, they have a place for us AND it is cheaper than the buggy cabin – Jackson Mountain Homes!  Yeah!  She (I think it is Christine) needs to see when she can have it ready – we need to call her back in about 15 minutes.  Sweet! Not 2 minutes later, we get a call from the buggy cabin owners and guess what?!! The bugs are NOT ticks  – they are BEDBUGS!!!  Bedbugs? Really?  Bedbugs?  Those things are REAL??!?!?  So, he tells my husband that their bites are harmless like a mosquito’s, but we need to take serious precautions to prevent bringing them home with us (all you need is one female with eggs and you’re screwed!).  We should wash and dry all of our clothes and spray our bags with bug spray.  So, he will refund all of our money and throw in an extra $25 for laundry and bug spray (wow, how generous).  This is not what we had planned for our vacation – this was really beginning to suck.  But, wait, it gets better….

It has been more than 15 minutes and now it is time to call Jackson Mountain Homes!  (Ever since the Bug Man told me to run our clothes through a dryer that’s what  I had been doing).  I was in the laundry area and I hear Mike’s voice getting louder and louder and some expletives flowing and then, BAM!, the phone has been slammed.  I run out of the laundry room to inquire about the tantrum and he says that Jackson Mountain Homes won’t rent to us now because of the bedbug infestation.  What??  How did she know?  We only just found out ourselves about 2 minutes ago.  It had to be the exterminator!!!  Why did he do that to us (did he know “Christine”)?  Were we now pariahs in Gatlinburg?  Had we been blacklisted for all rentals?

ARMED & DANGEROUS!!!

WANTED DEAD or ALIVE

DO NOT RENT TO!! If you see them approaching lock your doors and hide under your desks!

This was the craziest damn vacation I had ever experienced.  We sat the kids on the couch and warned them that we may not be able to stay in Gatlinburg (there were probably wanted posters going up all over Gatlinburg as soon as Mike hung up on “Christine” – we had bugs AND we weren’t afraid to use them!) and that we may have to improvise and possibly go to Memphis or Nashville.  They were all in and troopers about the whole thing!

Mike called the second number that the jerky Bug Man gave us – Gatlinburg Real Estate Rentals.  We all held our breath while he called . . . . . . . . . we were in luck!  The Engledow family did not seem to be blacklisted (or maybe they hadn’t seen the posters yet) AND they had a cabin for us!   We were going to be staying in the Dream Catcher .  Well, needless to say, the cabin was free of bedbugs, we extended our stay one more day (due to our lost day) and had a great time!  However, I did make Mike check all of the beds a couple of times before we went to bed that first night.

What I didn’t tell you is that while we were moving from one cabin to another, I did research on my smartphone about bedbugs.  I wish I hadn’t done that, but I needed to know what we might be in for.  Now I know A LOT about bedbugs so if you have a question, just ask me.  I have now added another item to my worry list (I need that like I need a hole in the head).

The final part of our story is that when we got back home on Sunday, April 11th, we pulled in the driveway, unloaded the entire car, and transferred all of our clothes, stuffed animals and coats to trash bags.  Rachel and I took the trash bags full of clothes to a laundromat for a thorough cleaning and drying – we did not want to bring anything into the house until it had been properly decontaminated.  Mike sprayed down every suitcase, toiletry bag and backpack with bug spray.  He also sprayed down the van after we got home.  Not really how I wanted to spend my afternoon after riding in a car for 6.5 hours, but we needed to feel that we had done all we could to keep the bedbugs from biting!

As the saying goes:

“Don’t Let the Bedbugs Bite!”

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My Cooking Mojo is Slipping Away

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Okay, I have to say that I’ve been pretty successful in preparing yummy, well-received meals day after day and week after week.  I have been on a roll, baby!  And, I’ve been getting a little spoiled.  It is has been awhile since I’ve made something that the family has requested to be placed on the “Never Make Again List”.   That completely changed this week.  Why?  I’m off my game and I’ve been mulling over why ever since dinner this evening (I’ll get to that in a minute). I’ve traced it back to the day that I found out my grocery store (O’Malia’s) was closing.

I wasn’t able to do my entire shopping trip at one store this past weekend because my store was closing and the shelves were bare – it really threw me off.  Usually when something did not make my carefully crafted  shopping list, going up and down the familiar aisles always triggered the “oh, yeah, I need that” reflex and I magically left the store with everything I needed (Okay, I may be exaggerating a bit).  Well, I finished part two (part one being the trip to my naked O’Malia’s) of my fateful grocery extravaganza of Sunday, March 14th at Whole Foods because it was the closest grocery store and I didn’t know where else to go.  As you know, Whole Foods is an organic shopping experience and I’m completely unfamiliar with the store (layout, what’s available, etc.)  I have to admit I was a little discombulated.  During the week, I had to go back to the grocery store 2 additional times because I missed some items on my list:  ketchup (Th meatloaf), chicken, orzo, arugla, lemons, yadda-yadda-yadda-blah-blah-blah!  I HATE grocery shopping!!

Sunday, March 14th Dinner:  Corned Beef and cabbage  / Green Beans.  I know, I should have had the corned beef on the 17th, but I didn’t!  Well, green beans are one of the few veggies 2 of my 3 kids will eat, so we eat them a lot.  I got online to find an interesting green bean recipe.  I had my 2 lbs of fresh, organic green beans and did something so awful to them that  my husband would not even eat them!   If Mike won’t eat them, then that means they are BAD!  (Here is the recipe so you know to avoid it (Green Goddess Green Beans).  I can’t describe how I felt after that dinner.  I got the “Hey, I really like that you are trying new things” pep talk.

Monday, March 15th Dinner:  Chicken Monte Cristo / Rice / Broccoli.  The Chicken Monte Cristo is a dish that I assembled at Dream Dinners.  After assembling meals at DD, you take them home and put them in your freezer.  Well, I forgot to pull it out of the freezer to thaw!  They do have “If Frozen” directions, so okay, I still fixed it.  I overcooked it – they were stuck on the bottom of the pan!  How did that happen?  I cook these things all of the time!  They were still edible (kind of ) and my family was gracious about it.

Tuesday, March 16th Dinner:  Not-sagna Pasta Toss (stove top lasagna – Rachael Ray Recipe) / Salad.  I make this every two weeks because my entire family loves it and it is easy.  I could make this meal in my sleep! Well, It was a little runnier than normal, how did I screw that up?  Also, the consistency wasn’t the same because I bought low-fat ricotta cheese.  I am trying to cook healthier at my house for all of us, but I’m never using low-fat ricotta cheese ever again.  My son, Jack, left a lot on his plate – he NEVER does that. 

Okay, so what the hell was going on this week?!  Every meal seemed to be getting worse.

Wednesday, March 17th Dinner:  Lemon Roasted Chicken / Dilled Orzo / Arugula Salad (click here for recipe).  The Roasted Chicken?  It was a hit and easy to make.  The Arugula Salad?  Also, another hit (my oldest suggested adding roasted pine nuts).  The Dilled Orzo?  See the note on the Sunday Green Bean disaster!  At Whole Foods I bought organic, whole wheat orzo.  My family was NOT a fan of the whole wheat orzo or the dill.  Again, my husband left it on his plate! 

I can’t remember the last time Mike left this much food on his plate!  I am really rattled at this point.  Well, Thursday is another day! Right?

TODAY, Thursday, March 18th Dinner:  Meatloaf (Bobby Flay recipe) / Bleu Cheese Mashed Potatoes / Asparagus.   I have made the Bobby Flay meatloaf recipe many times, but today I burned the top of it and possibly ruined a pan (it is soaking as I write).  Okay, distracted by helping my son with his Independent Study Project (another topic for another post), I almost set my kitchen on fire!  I’m helping Jack with his ISP and my middle one says “What is THAT smell?”.  “Well, honey, that would be scalding, burning potatoes that I was boiling for our bleu cheese mashed potatoes.”  My 3-quart Wolfgang Puck sauce pan is now junk!  I have made mashed potatoes a ton of times!  So, now we had charred meatloaf and no potatoes with dinner.  We had leftover rice instead.  At least the asparagus was unharmed 🙂

My sauce pan was burning, smoke was billowing everywhere and the downstairs smoke detectors were going off!  What an exciting afternoon.  I took the smoking pan outside and set it down on the deck in a panic because I had to run back in to tame the smoke detectors.  Once the noise stopped, I went back outside to get the smoking pan – I picked it up and guess what?  There is a nice round charred spot on the deck left by my sauce pan – Great!  Now, I’ve ruined my deck and my sauce pan.  Oh, brother.

After dinner, we were on our way to my middle daughter’s choir concert and I realized that I smelled like smoke (my shirt, jeans, hair, etc).  It wasn’t smokey bar smell, it was burnt food smell.  Another, Great!  I felt sorry for the people who had to sit next to me in the auditorium this evening.

What a week!  I’m afraid to go back in the kitchen –  I need to regroup before my weekend grocery trip on Saturday.   I need my mojo back 🙂

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The Closing of a Grocery Store

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Okay, so a grocery store is closing March 26th.  So What!?  Well, the store I’m talking about is my local Joe O’Malia’s .  This is the store of my choosing where I do my weekly grocery ritual.  The thing you need to know about me is that I really HATE grocery shopping, but I do it because, well, we need to eat to live.

Well, I walked into my local Joe O’Malia’s today to do my weekly ritual and guess what?!  I saw a sign on the door informing me that my store will be closing forever and that the last day would be March 26th!  The store located at 126th Street and Gray Road would be more than happy to help me after March 26th. What?  I wasn’t quite sure I understood.  What is that sign trying to tell me?

Thus, began my whirlwind flight through the 5 Stages of Grief. 

Denial:  I was in total denial.  I stopped, stared and re-read the sign.  Surely, they were announcing that they were just going to be closed on that ONE day, March 26th.  Of course, Whew! And, then they would be available to me again on the 27th.  Right?  So, thinking that all was right with the world, I continued on my way.

Anger:  Well, the state of denial lasted about 30 seconds and quickly turned to disbelief and anger as I walked the familiar walk toward the produce section.  Where had all the produce gone?  Where were the potatoes? avocados? asparagus?  I started hyper-ventilating.  Okay, calm down.  They were re-vamping the place and it was in a state of remodel.  Yep, that had to be it.  Well, it became increasingly clear as I walked toward the meat counter that the sign might be true (there were about 3 pork chops left).  The store was closing.  This stage of grief lasted the entire shopping trip (which was very short, BTW).  As I was headed toward the next phase of the grieving process, I started to get really angry again when I realized that I was going to have to go to another grocery store today to finish my shopping!

Bargaining:  Well, who could I bargain with?  The devil?  That was unlikely.  I really didn’t hang out in this phase of the grieving process.

Depression:  I am languishing in this phase.  I am depressed.  I had finally found a store that wasn’t HUGE , that special ordered items for me, where I knew the meat guys, the deli guys, etc.  I had the store layout memorized and that was how my shopping list was organized (I know, crazy, right? See first post).  It made the shopping trip go faster (remember, I HATE to go grocery shopping!).  The store was within walking and biking distance from my house.  If we forgot something, no problem!  Just run over to O’Malia’s!  Well, now where am I going to grocery shop?  All of the other stores near my house are the HUGE stores that are not personal and don’t take your groceries out to your car.  I’m going to have to memorize another layout!  I’m almost 45 for goodness sake – how can I be expected to do that!?  I’m too old and too busy!

Acceptance:  I’m not quite at this stage yet.  My husband is trying to fix it for me (as husbands usually do) and suggested that I go to the only remaining O’Malia’s left in Carmel.  I honestly try to go to the store only once a week and thus, my weekly shopping trips are meticulously planned and take awhile.  I do this to try to save money.  I used to go the to store almost every day due to lack of planning and would end up spending way too much on food that would ultimately spoil and go bad.  Since I now do one big weekly trip, my husband is encouraging me to travel across town to go to last remaining neighborhood grocery store.  I may just do that starting next week, but I have to mull it over.  I haven’t completely graduated to the acceptance phase.  Maybe “they” will realize that I would really like this store to stay open. . . . .